Category Archives: General Posts

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The Do Marriage Social Media Challenge


Ok, from postings like Why Marriage Won’t Work Burn the Ships you may gather that I am not a big fan of social media sites consuming an unhealthy amount of our time.  Now, before you start wagging a finger and calling me a hypocrite, yes Do Marriage has a social media page.  I am  not swinging a broad stroke and condemning all social media.  There are definitely some (not many in my opinion) redeeming qualities to social media sites.

Let me tell you about my pivotal moment and maybe it will explain better.

Continue reading The Do Marriage Social Media Challenge

3 Things We Can Take Away from War Room (the Movie)

     When War Room came out I was a bit confused about the title. The previews surely didn’t look like a typical war movie (and I am big fan of them) and rightfully so (it looked more like the proverbial chick flick) because it is a different type of war altogether.  Admittedly I was hesitant but a group of men – yeah that’s right men – decided we would go see it and wow, were we glad we did.

Continue reading 3 Things We Can Take Away from War Room (the Movie)

Five Things Your Wife Would Love to Hear You Say

Five Things Your Wife Would Love to Hear  You Say

1.) Don’t worry about dinner any night this week; I will pick something up.

2.) When you get home announce that tonight’s her night off; you have dinner, cleanup, the kids, homework, whatever.   Let her have the remote.

Continue reading Five Things Your Wife Would Love to Hear You Say

Where Are You God?


God’s not angry, apathetic or absent.  It’s the theme of one of Andy Stanley’s services and it really hit home recently.

Three times in the last week I have been in conversations with people that have emotionally asked “Where is God?” I was so quiet on the other end of the line that they inquired if I was still there.  I was, but I was so deep in thought that for one of those rare moments I had nothing to reply.  I thought about giving them some cliché answer or feel-good comeback but they were struggling, deeply hurting and that wasn’t going to help.   They were looking for real answers. Continue reading Where Are You God?

Why Marriage Won’t Work

      Here is a insightful and extremely popular article from June of 2015 that really drives home some excellent points about why marriage won’t work in our brave new world.  “5 reasons we can’t handle marriage anymore” by Anthony D’Ambrosio of The Asbury Park (N.J.) Press.  They’re so accurate that they are at least five of the nails in the coffin lid of a seemingly dead institution – marriage.

      If you are not as inclined to read the article  yet, and I strongly encourage you to do so at some point,  I have repeated the bullet points here.

  1. 2) Finances cripple us.
  2. 3) We’re more connected than ever before, but completely disconnected at the same time.
  3. 4) Our desire for attention outweighs our desire to be loved.
  4. 5) Social media just invited a few thousand people into bed with you.
  5. 1) Sex becomes almost non-existent.

     These are all valid reasons why marriage won’t work.  However, marriage isn’t a cure-all for our personal issues. We must be careful not to go dragging “marriage busting” personal issues into a relationship, relabeling them as marital issues, and then claiming them as the reason that marriage won’t work.  This is coming from the voice of experience.   But don’t stop reading because….

Marriage will work and it does work and it absolutely can for you!

Continue reading Why Marriage Won’t Work

BURN THE SHIPS!

Burn the Ships

In 1519 Spanish conquistador and explorer Hernando Cortez decided that he would do what had not been in six-hundred years.  His unlikely feat was to sail the ocean with 500 soldiers 100 sailors and seize the treasure the Aztecs Indians of Mexico had hoarded.  However, once he landed on the foreign shores some of his men, having doubts about their own numbers and attacking a six-hundred year old civilization began to plot to seize some ships and sail for friendly Cuba.  You see his men were not completely committed and he knew that if retreat was an option that his men would not be focused and one-hundred percent committed to the task.  His solution?  Burn the ships.  Once the ships were gone it was victory or death, all or nothing. And it worked!

Listen up all of those that are not 110% committed to your relationship and men I am primarily talking directly to you.  I heard the excuse just today; “why should I do it if she won’t?”  I’ll tell you why, and you can push back, argue or just flat out reject what I’m about to tell you it won’t surprise me.  In fact I don’t blame you – I used to think it was ludicrous too.  I am here to tell you it’s not.

Continue reading BURN THE SHIPS!

One For The Busy Moms

This idea is all my mom’s – God rest her soul – I miss her dearly.

I am one of seven raised by a hardworking single mom. Mom – the job that never ends. Let me tell you what mine did to get some relief.

The local sporting goods store had a table where they would put all of the custom made jerseys and shirts that were not sold. Sometimes the lettering would be off, the numbers wrong, or they were just never claimed.  The orphaned shirts were sold at deep discounts; usually less than the value of the shirt. Continue reading One For The Busy Moms

Parallels Between Swimming and Where I Am in My Marriage.

I once told a friend that swimming is like my marriage. I was terrible at swimming but once I did get help it made me aware of some things.

1.)  I know how to do it well enough to stay afloat. I just didn’t know how bad I was until I got the right help.

2.) It’s difficult but gets easier once someone shows you the techniques.

3.) It’s the subtleties in your actions that make all the difference in how much effort you have to exert.

Continue reading Parallels Between Swimming and Where I Am in My Marriage.